Socialization of Men and Women

Killing us softly   men perform violence towards women by the effect  directly or indirectly from mass media. She talks about how women are portrayed as a piece of object dehumanizing us women. She also talks about the values advertising imposes us as women how women should look. According to advertisements an ideal women is perfect of flaws , has no blemishes and in fact no pores she jokes. Secondly women are portrayed as sex symbols where only one part of the body is focused primarily and compared to being an object.
by Jean Kilbourne opened my eyes towards advertisements. It made me realize the hidden message and wrongful portrayal of us as woman. She talks about how advertising has shaped our everyday views on simple things. She advises to take advertising seriously. She talks about the gender exploitation in advertisements. She also strains the relationship of how

 Women being treated as object is loosely connected to violence. She also talks about how advertisement is biased towards women of color and mostly portrayed as animals ,the other being or simply exotic .She also talks about weight issues where skinny is perfect body type in the advertisement world. Women should be thin as a stick and possess no body fat like the ads in most magazines and TVs  have skinny models. The direct effect is on majority of women who are curvy and overweight. It brings the  self esteem of  most women down as being skinny and possessing large breast is nearly impossible without the blessed gene or going under the knife(implants).Overall the video teaches us a great deal about behind the scenes of advertisements and the wrongful portrayal of Women.

While relating to the ideal skin type in  ads  ,fairness ads are big deal in India. Well you all know majority of women and men in India are darker on the complexion side not all but mostly. The ad industry spend lots of money on making commercials of women turning fair from a week of using fairness creams. We all know that it is nearly impossible to change the color of the skin through using creams that will change our natural color but somehow enhance our psychological thought that it does work . Honestly it rarely changes. Anyways , the idea of fair skin in India is the ideal women should be .It has a major impact on most women who are naturally colored.

(pic above an indian ad “Fair and Lovely” fairness cream showing a women shedding her natural skin to become fair )

‘A call to Men’ by Tony Porter was a very informative speech from a man point of view on women. He shares his life experiences from growing up to his own experience on raising kids himself. His view on how boys are raised in a different method from young age really made sense. Boys don’t cry is a phrase I have always heard of. While growing up until today the only male that I have seen cry is my uncle when my grandmother passed away which was natural. Even in my circle of friends I have hardly seen any of my male friends cry if they did they were looked upon as queer. Tony Porter’s speech on the comparisons between Men and Women are instilled in childhood itself. “Boys are taught from young age that they are the superior being, strong, dominating, courageous, no pain, no emotions with the exception of anger and no fear. Men are in charge women are not that men lead and women should just follow whatever men say , men are superior and women are inferior , men are strong and women are weak , women are of less value meaning women are object.” He explains these phenomena as collective socialization of Men also known as ‘Man Box’.

He brings about his own experience from his father when his brother died. His father didn’t cry in front of the women but cried in front of him and apologized for crying and uplifted him for not crying. He also brings on an example about his question to a young boy how he would feel if his coach said he played like a girl in the basketball court the boy replied by saying he would be destroyed. Then he questions about how we are raising the concept of girl. He also talks about his first encounter to women being treated as an object .He felt mortified but the same time he felt remorse and excited for not getting caught and actually making others believe he did it and not a single thought on the girl who was an object. He concludes by saying even good men are the basis of violence against women and liberation of the guidelines of man box will be the liberation for women.